dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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