I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
My pussy is not your playground.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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