Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
