just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
this is an emotional support booty call
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
