he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
