yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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