chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize