I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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