I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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