MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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