is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
