He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
