So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
