a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize