your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Randomize
