All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Panties = found
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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