i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
