mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize