You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
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