I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
