I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
