Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
