Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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