Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
