The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
