Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Randomize
