Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Randomize
