she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
