when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
This beer is not sobering me up at all
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Randomize
