tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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