First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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