Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
