Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize
