Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I got her a Nickelback box set.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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