You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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