Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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