Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
