Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
