This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
