What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
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