I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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