that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Randomize
