I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
