Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I have fence marks all over my body
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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