Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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