Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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