Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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