the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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