What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
What a dumb baby whore.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
