Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Randomize
