Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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